Grab bag

"What will you be doing in 30 years?"

I was watching TV, and this was a commercial.

But it wasn't the financial planning/career development/life insurance/yawn ad that I thought it was.

"You'll be eating."

Well, now he had my attention.

"And you'll want your teeth for that."

True. Very true.

It was a freaking ad for 1-800dentist.com. And it's my favorite ad in a long time.

Well, that and the literacy.gov ad with the kids using their library books as train tickets to get to Oz, Hogwarts, Narnia, Wonderland and the like.

*****

Modern-built vehicles are a lot like the family dog.

At the most, you should only expect about 15 years out of them, after which they just kind of limp around and smell bad, and you want to cry every time you look at them. They require special diets; their exercise shouldn't be too strenuous, and you should just eventually prepare yourself for the worst. Don't be too surprised if it happens when you're out having fun.

*****

I carried an umbrella last night and today during the Great Spring Slurpee Event of 2010. It felt like a very Mr. Tumnus-ish thing to do, and it turned out to be pretty practical. These weren't snowflakes; they were snowballs that God was flinging on Laramie. Can you blame Him? Meanwhile, Lazarus is not handling the slushee-in-the-streets very well. Neither am I, for that matter. My nonfunctioning heater doubles as a nonfunctioning defroster/defogger, and the result isn't pretty. Add a battery that comes dangerously close to kerplunking after I drive through the mini-lakes that make up Laramie's streets, and I've about had it.

*****

In a month, I'll be on vacation.

(Hallelujia)

There aren't enough exlamation marks to convey the joy, so I won't start trying.