Yours vs. mine

"Sarah, why do you let it bother you so much? It's her problem; not yours. Relax. Let it go."

It was a much-needed, very frank conversation with a coworker about a situation I was dealing with some time ago. I asked for an honest opinion, I got it ... and a bit more. I like this coworker's perspective and his willingness to tell me like he sees it.

And he was right. It was the other person's problem that I was allowing to rub me the wrong way, and it bothered the hell out of me; like someone else's itchy sweater. I don't need a better T-shirt; I need to quit letting my arms itch every time I look at your sweater.

It's a new mantra: "It's your problem, not mine. Yours, not mine ... not mine ..." I have enough of my own issues; I don't need to get all riled up by other people's personality problems.

Today, in another conversation with the same coworker and my boss, I could hear him getting ready to tell me the same thing about a new situation: "It's their problem; not yours. Let it go."

Let go. Good song. Better advice.

So many things are someone else's problem, and I let them affect me in absolutely the wrong way. Yes, it needs to be addressed; but it doesn't need to wear away at an otherwise level-headed approach to ... well, to anything. Work. Dating relationships. Family. Neighbors.

So many times, I could (and should) just step back, breathe and say: "It's your problem, not mine," and then just let it go after giving it only the attention that's necessary to deal with it, rather than getting immersed in it (and sometimes nearly drowning in it). There really aren't a lot of things worth getting that worked up over.

Your problem. Not mine.