20 May 2009

'Are you pregnant?'

No matter my question, my ailment, my complaint, the first thing the receptionist at my doctor's office asks is:

"Are you pregnant?"

(No)

"Are you certain?"

(Yes. Very.)

I don't know how being pregnant would affect, say, a painfully sore throat, a sudden, low-voltage-like tingling in my hands after my workout, or just scheduling my annual checkup. But they always check. Because your sore throat and incessant sneezing could be a herald of an immaculately conceived Mini You and not seasonal allergies, as you ignorantly assumed before.

"It cracks me up that they always ask that," I wrote to my brother.

"Weird," he wrote back. "Mine asks me the same thing ..."

So maybe it's a family thing.

I'm not pregnant. But my hands felt funky after my workout.

1 comment:

Fuzzy said...

The correct answer is: "No, my life partner is carrying our child."

Or:

"I was, but the fetus was extracted at 14 weeks, and is currently undergoing gene therapy so she'll become a bio-enhanced super soldier, and usher in the new age of Military Supremacy for Wyoming!"

Ok, so I read a lot of those "Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions" books when I was a kid. It was basically the precursor to "Here's your sign!"