Old vs. Single

Holly and I were talking last night about Sunday school classes and how she feels right at home in her College & Career class, even though she's likely the oldest person in the class (I, on the other hand, have not felt comfortable in a C&C class since ... well, since I graduated college).

I complained that there are College and Career classes, and there are Young Marrieds classes, but there is nothing for single adults who are neither in college nor fresh out of it.

We don't fit in anywhere.

"So I've signed up to make coffee during Sunday school so it's ready in time for the service," I said.

It's cheating, I know, and not every out-of-place singleton gets such an opportunity, but I see it as a triple-edged bonus.

a) I don't have to try to "fit in" to a mold that just doesn't hold me.

b) I don't get stuck with the task of creating a Singles class ("Weakness! Cowardice!" some of you are shouting at your monitors, I know. So go start your own class). And part of that is because "Singles" Sunday school classes or church groups have traditionally been viewed as church-sanctioned dating pools. I certainly don't want to be in charge of that. I can't even corral my own dating life.

c) I get to serve Jesus by serving coffee. God bless our yuppie Western world.

Holly said that even though her own church has changed its Young Marrieds class to be a Young Marrieds and Singles class, "everyone in the class is still either married or about to be married. I'd be the the only single person there, and I'd feel very single."

"And even though I'm the 'old lady' in my class," she continued, "I'd rather feel old than single."

I thought about that for a while (a long while, Hol - you really got me to thinking).

Single or old?

Neither sounds like an appealing appearance to me.

"Single" and "available" seem, to some people, to be synonymous. But they're not.

Appearing "single" (to me) smacks of "desperate, lonely ... " I don't want to appear desperate. I want to appear content. I want to be content, and I want to look it.

"Available" smacks of ... well, just "available." I'm not basing my future hopes and happiness on the off-chance that my future spouse (if he exists) is eating a doughnut in this room.

I'd rather feel (and appear) available than single.

And I don't think I'll ever want to feel (or appear) old. Not even when I really am old (and that's a way down the road - I'm only going to be twenty-ten next year ...).