Abandon and caution

Among the many extremes and opposites likely present in my character, I'd like to introduce you to this set: Blissful ignorance vs. over-caution.

In blissful ignorance, I have male friends, coworkers, acquaintances, etc., whom I interact with on a daily basis, not thinking anything of it beyond how I see that relationship (friend, coworker, guy I know from such-and-such). And, as far as I'm aware, things are fine. I'm not interested in them, and if something happens to come up to indicate they feel differently, I do and say what I think is adequate yet gentle enough to quash the situation and move on.

Until something blows up. You name it, you pick the situation -- what I thought were calm waters really turned out to be a huff-and-puff storm of pouting and temper tantrum lingering on the horizon. The storm eventually blows over, and people want things to go back to what they were ... but over-caution steps in.

Over-caution is a protective measure. Because no matter the guarantees given that the previous situation has been dealt with and is no longer a threat -- that all is calm -- there's the memory that the appearance of that supposed calm was there before. Before the storm.

Acting on the lessons learned from that situation, over-caution warns me that the best course of action is to maintain a distance, no matter how desired a restored friendship may be. In over-caution, I avoid any behavior that could possibly be misconstrued as encouraging further amorous attentions or ambitions. So I stay distant -- keep it civil, if a bit chilly.

As I said -- one extreme (blissful ignorance) to another (over-caution). Some increased level of vigilence and distance in the first situation might have let me avoid the second altogether. I don't know.